LUSHTICE

Now me, I’m the life of the party…

Yesterday I went to Toronto, and it SUCKED. Mostly because Alicia sucks as a roadtripping buddy. I really miss my awesome roadtrippin’ friends. JILLIE LUSH, WHERE YOU AT BITCH?!

Ugh. I’m long overdue for a worthwhile roadtrip. I don’t even want to go anywhere, I just want to drive and see the road for hours on end.

I’ve been working my ass off this week in school to play catch up. I’m about a month or so behind everyone else in all 5 of my classes. Thank you Amazon.com for mailing my textbooks everywhere else BUT my apartment. They’ve been sent to the Post Office, Buffstate’s residence life, Buffstate’s Political Science department, my parent’s house x2…Good thing exams are next week.

Oh Tumblr, I forgot to tell you about my new kitten that I found under Alicia’s hood of her car (he hid in her engine and caught a ride to my heart from Amherst to Buffalo). His name is Hoodrat, and I’ll post pictures soon. I only have like 10,000 pictures of him anyhow.

I haven’t drank since that crazy limo party I won from Buffalo Bar Fly. The pictures of that night are up on the website, by the way. I recommend you DON’T look at them, unless you want to laugh your ass off at my ridiculousness.

Other than that, I can’t wait for Spring. Buffalo needs to fucking stop tricking me into thinking it’s about to be spring with 40 degree weather and no snow on the ground, because it’s really depressing when it’s 15 degrees the next day and some snow is back.

P.S. I cannot stop listening to rap. Akon’s “I’m so Paid” and Gym Class Hero’s “Cookie Jar” will never get old.

Cheers,

Jodie

Happy Valentine’s Day!

My Valentine’s Day has been the best ever. Paul sent me a bouquet of gorgeous flowers. Nobody has ever done anything like that for me, and it’s especially amazing since he lives all the way in Las Vegas. I can’t wait until January when I get to live with him, I really hope it all works out as planned.

Also, all of you that hate Valentine’s Day, quit hatin’. Learn to take the holiday and appreciate those that mean the most to you, even if it’s just friends and family and not a boyfriend/girlfriend. It’s sounds really lame and cliche, but I really think that’s what it’s truly about. I mailed out some random/special things to some friends of mine that don’t live closeby as a reminder of how awesome they are. I sent Paul a hand-sewn heart with a key — “The key to my heart”. I called my mom and dad and told them how awesome they are. I gave my lonely, old neighbor a Valentine’s Day card with a few lotto tickets inside (she likes to gamble—lotto tickets, bingo, casinos, etc). I’ve done as much as I can to show everyone I know how much they mean to me.

I’ll leave you with these lyrics, I can’t stop listening to this song. It perfectly describes how I feel about Paul:

I’d walk through hell for you.
Let it burn right through my shoes.
These soles are useless without you.
Through hell for you
Let the torturing ensue.
My soul is useless without you

And if they sent a whirlwind,
I’d hug it like a harmless little tree.
Or an earthquake,
I’d calm it,
And I’d bring you back to me,
And I’d hold you
In my weak arms like a first born.

I’d walk through hell for you.
Let it burn right through my shoes.
These soles are useless without you.
Through hell for you
Let the torturing ensue.
My soul is useless without you (through hell for you)

(through hell for you) without you
Without you (through hell for you)
Without you (through hell for you)

Now, I’ve walked through hell for you,
What’s an adventurer to do
But rest these feet at home with you

Cheers,

Jodie

http://jillielush.tumblr.com/

that is my new tumblr, add it. I figured I’d post my own ramblings there rather then muck this one up with me, me, me, me which is what I’ve been doing. I’ll post here once in awhile - definitely when it pertains to both Jodie & I.

xo Jillie

Monopoly, anyone?

From: http://dealbook.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/02/10/live-nation-and-ticketmaster-agree-to-merge/

” Live Nation, the largest concert promoter, and Ticketmaster Entertainment, the No. 1 ticket seller, announced their widely reported merger deal on Tuesday morning. The stock-for-stock transaction would create a powerhouse in the music and live entertainment industries and likely draw intense scrutiny from antitrust regulators and lawmakers.

In a joint statement, the companies said that Ticketmaster shareholders will get 1.384 Live Nation shares, subject to adjustments, for each Ticketmaster share. Based on Live Nation’s closing price Monday of $5.29, that valued each Ticketmaster share at $7.32, or about 11 percent above where that stock closed the previous day.

Shareholders of each company would end up owning about half of the merged company, the statement said. The boards of both companies have approved the transaction.

By merging, the companies said they would be better positioned to market their artists and fill stadiums, and save about $40 million a year in operating costs.

But the deal was generating controversy even before it was announced.

Bruce Springsteen, who denounced Ticketmaster for referring potential buyers of his concert tickets to a higher-priced reseller it owned, has criticized the possible merger on his Web site.

And Bill Pascrell Jr., a Democratic representative of New Jersey, called for the House Judiciary Committee to hold hearings after news of the potential merger broke.

Minutes after the deal was announced Tuesday, it drew criticism from Charles Schumer, a Democratic senator from New York who sits on the Senate Judiciary Committee.

“This merger would give a giant, new entity unrivaled power over concertgoers and the prices they pay to see their favorite artists and bands,” the senator said in an e-mailed statement. “It must be viewed skeptically and scrutinized with a fine-toothed comb by the Justice Department and the Federal Trade Commission.”

In Tuesday’s announcement, the companies suggested the economic downturn was one of the reasons for the deal.

“No different from any other industry, the challenges are all around every aspect of live entertainment,” Barry Diller, the chairman of Ticketmaster, said. “Being able to put Live Nation and Ticketmaster into an equal partnership will allow the companies to get through this difficult period and be able to expand live entertainment options to audiences throughout the world.”

Mr. Diller will become nonexecutive chairman of the enlarged company, to be called Live Nation Entertainment. Michael Rapino, who is chief executive of Live Nation, will be the company’s chief executive, and Irving Azoff, the chief executive of Ticketmaster, will be the company’s executive chairman.

Live Nation was advised by Goldman Sachs and law firm Latham & Watkins in the deal, while Deutsche Bank advised the company’s board. Ticketmaster was advised by JPMorgan Chase, Wachtell Lipton Rosen & Katz and Gibson Dunn & Crutcher, with Allen & Company providing a fairness opinion. “

I cannot believe this is legal. Then again — it doesn’t surprise me. Hopefully the FTC will do a thorough investigation and come to the conclusion that nothing good can come from this merger. Honestly, a monopoly is not going to save the music industry or the economy. I’ve been lucky enough to rarely have a need to utilize  ticketing-services like Ticketmaster. But what about the millions of people that have? Service charges are becoming more and more of an inconveince with fees quickly approaching the cost of the ticket itself. That’s just crazy! I realize everyone needs to make a profit, but good grief! But what can you do? People are still going to pay the price — bitching and complaining along the way. I will say that this merger certainly doesn’t make me want to run right out and purchase tickets from this new company. I’d much rather take my chances buying tickets at the door - hoping the show doesn’t sell out before I get there. Sure that doesn’t particularly work with large venue shows / popular acts… but I was never really attending those shows anyway.

It will be interesting to see how this all plays out. I wonder how many artists are going to follow suit with The Boss and look for alternative ticketing outlets?

xo Jillie

Since I actually watched The Grammys this year, here are my thoughts:

• U2’s performance was pretty horrible in terms of U2 performances — nothing to start the telecast off with, that’s for sure. What a horrible choice for a single too.
• Whitney Houston. The bitch is back and crack is still wack.
• I am probably an asshole for saying this — but would the crowd have given Jennifer Hudson a standing ovation when she won the “Best R&B Album” award, if she hadn’t recently suffered the loss of her mother, nephew and brother? Probably not. Then again, what do I know?
• Chris Brown is a real fucking douche bag — who would have thought?! Dude messed up… big time!!! Who the hell raises a hand to a classy dame like Rhianna? Nice job with the car accident PR story cover up btw… lolz.
• I loved the last minute replacement performance of Justin Timberlake, Al Green, Keith Urban and Boyz II Men. Super funny — everyone upstaged Boys II Men. They were barely noticeable in the background. Guess Motown Philly ain’t back again.
• Sheryl Crow looked fantastic —- sometimes I can’t believe her age. Girl’s got it going on.. still. Wish she would have performed.
• Musically I have nothing against Coldplay —- but my god… Chris Martin looks like a fucking idiot dancing around on stage. The guy has no stage presence what so ever. I think Ashlee Simpson’s SNL jig was better.
• Dear Kid Rock, you can stop sucking off “Werewolves Of London” and “Sweet Home Alabama” any minute now. Summer’s over, no one cares.
• Katy Perry looked amazingly classy on the red carpet - maybe the best I’ve seen that broad look. But her performance outfit? FAIL. She obviously went out on top though. WIN.
• Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus…. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
• Who the hell thought up the JoBros & Stevie Wonder collaboration? Ridic.
• The rumors are true, Blink 182 is back. — This is great news and all, but this is not “the best day of my life” “a day that all music lovers will remember” or “better than Obama”— seriously? what the fuck are you kids smoking? Blink was a “gateway band” for me back in the day and they’ll always mean a lot to me, but this is really nothing to get so completely amped up about. But maybe I’m just being an asshole because I had to put my dog to sleep yesterday. Actually, I would have preferred if Blink stayed in the “indefinite hiatus” as I can’t help but think they’re coming back together right now for all the wrong reasons. But for the record let me just say that - YES, I AM EXCITED. I’ll stop here. I wouldn’t want to ruin your best day ever!!!
• Sir Paul McCartney with Dave Grohl on drums was killer — a performance I could throw my support behind. Maybe next year they shouldn’t seat Sir McCartney right up front … too many artists playing suck up. He’s Paul motherfucking McCartney, and you are?? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Shut up!
• Chasing Pavements is still such a ridiculously good song. Adele has pipes.
• M.I.A. = fierce as all hell on her due date!! Damn Girl!
• The Rap Pack / Swagg Pack was not anything special - sorry.
• I love me some T.I. and I love me some Justin Timberlake.
• Radiohead’s performance wasn’t that epic. It was good, but not as good as everyone is pretending it was.
• Obama won Grammys? HUH?
• Neil Diamond is the man. I sure hope the crowd was a drunken mess of high-fives and sing-a-long karaoke moves — because that’s what I always imagine people singing “Sweet Caroline” to be. Hell, that’s what I always am.
• “Best Long Form Music Video: Runnin’ Down A Dream Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers” - WHAT?! How was I not aware of such existence?
• The late-great George Carlin won “Best Comedy Album” in the pre-tel. Rightfully so!
• So happy to hear that Kings Of Leon received an award for “Best Rock Performance By A Duo Or Group w/ Vocals” for Sex On Fire in the pre-tel.
• I love Green Day. I love Green Day. I love Green Day. I also love that they were apparently making some “huge announcement” or so people thought. I kind of sort of think they told people to watch the Grammy’s for the Blink announcement and didn’t actually have any news of their own. Still… excited to see them out & about… and sooo stoked for the new album.

May angels lead you in…

R.I.P. Candy

08/08/1995 - 02/07/2009

We took Candy to the SPCA to be put down this afternoon. I felt absolutely horrible doing it, but it had to be done. Her organs were starting to shut down and keeping her alive any longer would have been a sin, not to mention a crime. I just wish we could have taken her to a vet or had someone come and give her a shot here at home. I can’t help feeling like we abandonned her when she needed us most. We dropped her off at a loading dock, said goodbye to her as she layed on a gurney and they wheeled her away - as she looked back at us, probably wondering what was going on and where we were going. The people weren’t even going to give us her collar! They loaded her out of the car and immediately said “Are you guys all set?” and were ready to just wheel her away just like that. My dad asked for her collar and I ran over to hug her and tell he she was a good dog and I loved her. My dad did the same and then they wheeled her away and that was it. It’s been about four hours now and I still feel like the scum of the earth and can’t stop crying. I wish she could have died here and we could have buried her in the backyard. Now all we have is her collar, papers stating that she was euthanized, and 13 years of memories.

It’s been about 8 hours now and it hasn’t gotten any easier - I’ve stopped crying for the time being — but that’s only because I probably don’t have any tears left, my eyes are red, puffy, and dry.

I left the house for about two hours — got some food & coffee with an old friend, whom I haven’t seen in a few months. I talked and she listened. We reminised about some things and shot the shit. It was nice to put my mind somewhere else for a little while. I came home and part of me expected to see Candy. It’s amazing how quiet it is now — even though she barely made any noise. I walk into the living room and she’s not there. I walk into the kitchen and she’s not there. I wonder how long it will be before I stop expecting her to be there? We’ve had her the entire time we’ve lived in this house. This is going to take a lot of getting use to. Mom put away her dishes, her leash, her collar, her blanket, the baby gate…  but I’m still reminded of her, actually I think there’s still dog food in the fridge - definitely in the basement. My parents put a picture of her up on the fridge. I found a few more when I got home.

That god damn Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercial came on earlier and I lost it. I had stopped crying for awhile and then BAM! I just turned on some music and am starting to tear up again. Shit sucks! Generally, I do not like to cry or show this type of emotion - I like to think I’m a bitch. And then I see Candy’s nametag and start bawling all over again. I’m sure I’ll cry myself to sleep for the next however long. I know for sure that if I see a chocolate lab any time soon I’m going to lose it.

I know putting her down was the absolute best thing we could do for her — she’s at peace now. Doesn’t mean it hurts any less - or I’m going to miss her any less. She was my first dog and there will always be a place for her in my heart. She really was a great dog - a great best friend, companion, etc. She was pretty much a child to me. And the loss is going to be felt for quite some time.

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together…. 

Author unknown…

I miss you already. Until we meet again… see you at the rainbow bridge…. I love you, baby girl ♥ ♥ ♥

xo Mama (Jillie)

If Today is Your Birthday: February 5

“This is a year when you are itching to do something new, but you are perhaps unsure about what that “something” is! You are likely closing important projects or “chapters” in your life. If you normally lead an active life with initiating qualities, you may feel quite restless. There may be a sense of loss, perhaps a feeling as though you are losing your identity. The year, in a general sense, is best used as a meditative time for inner searching. It is a time for letting go of the past in order to prepare for the new. Although the new is still totally unrecognizable, it is important to allow the necessary surrender to the unknown.”

This whole paragraph definitely describes what I’m dealing with right now — although I’m not sure I want to surrender and “let go” just yet. I have no clue what that “something” is and it’s driving me crazy! 2009 hasn’t been a good year by any means as of yet. Also, the sense of loss is much more than a feeling — it’s reality. My dog is in and out of it today. She’s too weak to hold herself up anymore. I just spent a good deal of time scrubbing the rug as she had an accident when I tried to lift her to get her outside. She’s currently passed out. I have a panic attack every time I glance into the next room to look at her. The best case senario is that she passes away in her sleep tonight. Otherwise we’re going to take her to be put down this weekend. I don’t think I’m strong enough to handle this. She’s been my best friend since I was 10 years old. Also — my grandmother is terminal with Lung Cancer. She’s doing down hill fast and isn’t expected to live much longer. She’s been the strongest and most stubborn women I’ve known for the past 24 years. So yeah — this year is a definite year of loss for me.

You are likely to find yourself more accepting and understanding of your friends and lovers. Contentedness in love is likely to figure and to attract positive circumstances (and people) into your life. This influence can indicate favorable outcomes when it comes to legal affairs, education, and travel. This year, you’re bound to enjoy increased social opportunities as well as a boost in your personal popularity and magnetism. Others are looking on you favorably, particularly friends and lovers (or potential lovers). You are more friendly, optimistic, and big-hearted than usual. A cheerful and hopeful outlook increases your chances of gaining cooperation from others. This is a sociable, and perhaps self-indulgent, time when the pursuit of pleasure is one of your high priorities! You could find that you are more open and trusting of friends and lovers, and that you easily win others‘ trust. Healthy speculation is favored. Financial benefits may come your way. Some people fall in love under this influence.

I would very much so like favorable outcomes in education and travel. No idea where the legal affairs come in. Am I going to be sued? Perhaps? Collections agency sure as hell haven’t gotten a dime from me. It sounds as if I’m going to be a social butterfly again - excellent. And it’s about time I start putting “the pursuit of pleasure” in the high priority list. Financial benefits… yes, please. Love with financial benefits? Am I going to find a sugardaddy? Is that what you are telling me, dear horoscope? EXCELLENT.

Favorable influence for social meetings and events, and for situations that call for treating others with equality and respect. You may lose your fear of taking risks at this time, and happily embrace all that is new, unusual, and out-of-the-ordinary with regards to romantic involvements as well as financial undertakings. You are ready to experiment, but not necessarily ready to commit. This could be a good year for financial undertakings involving electronics, technology, the internet, metaphysics, and the arts, as well as group activities. You have a taste for the offbeat this year, and this energy can bring sudden or unexpected romance into your life, perhaps a scenario that feels like love at first sight. Childbirth is sometimes associated with this aspect.

I definitely take zero risks when it comes to romantic involvements and financial undertakings — both would be a welcome change. And damn right I’m not ready to commit! Wait… did that say Childbirth?!!!! Um…  I sure hope not!

You are likely to be recognized for your more unique qualities. Your personal magnetism runs quite high. You have the chance to improve your relationships with others—and with yourself! A humbly confident approach to life earns you respect. You tend to be looked upon favorably by others. You have the chance to shine, largely because you are projecting yourself with self-respect and modesty at once. You are especially appealing and charming just by being yourself. Opportunities—both personal and professional—are likely to present themselves as a result. You are not looking for credit for what you do, which frees you up to get it anyhow! Teaching others may be part of the picture, informally or formally.

I’m glad everyone is going to be magnetized to me. I like attention. I’m always charming ; )  Bring on these opportunities — particularly the professional ones.

Busy, busy, busy! At times, you may feel like the pace of your life is running ahead of you. You can be especially productive, however, in all types of communications—writing, speaking, learning, teaching, and so forth.

Communications is my field. I got this! Busy is how I like it — bring it!

Your intuition runs high. You are more sensitive artistically, your imagination is stirred, and you have an increased appreciation for subtleties. You are inspired and could even inspire others with your words. Some of your hunches could be prophetic. You are thinking more creatively, and express yourself with more sensitivity, compassion, and warmth.

Yes!!! I am so all about that paragraph. I do have some pretty good intuition.

You are more inclined to act upon your intuition, your sexual fantasies may be especially strong, and your creative impulses are potent. There will be times this year when you will have a “what will be, will be” attitude. This influence favors dancing, swimming, photography, arts, and entertainment. If you are an artist, this could be an especially inspired, imaginative, and productive year. Pay attention to your gut feelings, which will, more often than not, give you valuable information. If you are involved in sales, you will be able to tune into your client’s inner desires and motivations.

Sounds good! So what you mean is… it’s a good time for me to start my lucrative career as a singer/dancer/model? HAHA jk jk. bad inside joke.

This year, your social life is fun and expansive. Your communications and mental output are more original and creative. In general, you are inspired—you are certainly getting in touch with the dreamier, more spiritual side of your nature. Closing important projects or chapters in your life also figures, as you make room for new beginnings.”

So pretty much… this year is supposed to rule. I guess I just need to get past all of the obstacles and personal losses and get on with it. Hmmm. Lots to think about for sure.

xo Jille