LUSHTICE

BEST OF 2008 - Miscellaneous.

I’m heading up to Buffalo in a few hours to start the New Years celebrations with Jodie. That’s right — LUSHTICE together, again. More on that later.

Here is the rest of my BEST OF 2008

Top Mustachios of 2008:

Quotes of 2008:

“Whatsagoinon?” - Bret Michaels… I mean, Rock of Audio Love & Big Lush
“I’m so glad I corrupted you with my cotton candy.” - Jodie Justice
“DIBS!” - Kendyl Fields
“I think I have Hot Fries stuck in my hair!” - Abbey
“I’m a girl! Of course I smell good” - Me
“I don’t care if you’re a lesbien. You’re still hot.” - Summertime
“Can I walk home from here?” - Me
“I need to get married so I can get some” - Me
“I’m going to change my name to ‘Did he really just say that shit?’ “ - Jodie
“Who dis be? Where r the parties at?” - Some d00d
“I’ve realized that there’s never going to be anything between us. You are not hot anymore. You are immature and you play games?” - Trinidad
“Don’t interrupt me while I am looking at pictures of DRJ” - Me
“He’s being a bad husband. You have been a bad wife. You have a summertime bf! Who is also being a bad summertime bf. Everyone in this triangle is just bad!” - May May
“Hey! Leave Me Out Of This!” - May May & Smo 2008
“May May & Smo 2008!” - May May & Smo 2008
“Chickhomies!” - May May & Smo 2008
“I got this!” - Smo, May May, Brandi, Monica
“You’re not maintaining! You better straighten up!” - Dale The Whale
“So one time we funneled a beer at 5AM. And then later on I peed on your front porch.” - Me “If I could say one thing to him right now it would be FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU!” - Me

(I’m 100% positive I am forgetting so many wonderful things. Maybe I’ll update this.)

Top 15 Jillie “LUSH” / BFF DS nights:

1. New Years Eve - The New Year began @ Palm Gardens - where many bottles of champagne, shots of whiskey, labatt blues, and other assorted drinks were consumed. Before I knew it I was falling down drunk in the parking lot and surrounded by several cops. And then I was driven home by the cops. I ended my night passed out under the christmas tree, in the bathtub, and somehow woke up at 1PM in my bed.. in my pajamas. I’m still not exactly sure how I didn’t get a ticket for public intoxication. I guess it helps to live in a small town where the ex-police chief is your neighbor. Even better that he thinks my name is Melissa.

2. The night before Mr. & Mrs. Wedding — I decided to get absolutely shit-faced off everclear soaked cherries, shots of jack daniels, and god knows what else for god knows what reason. This resulted in blackouting out, being forced to throw up via David’s hand down my throat (no recollection), falling down drunk again and again, passing out finally, and waking up shortly there after and walking 5 miles home… still wasted.

3. BFF DS Tailgate / Warped Tour @ Darien Lake - Partying too hard, too early — throwing up before 10AM. Challenging some kids to beer pong - getting bored & wandering away, but not before spilling beer all over myself. Deciding it was a good idea to interview Keith Buckley w/ the girls — in true BFF DS / Buffalo fashion — WASTED. And generally just running around like a drunken pirate/mustachio man with Jodie.

4. Harley Happenings Beer Tent / Palm Gardens — G-Town Reunion of Epic Proportions complete with charging mass amounts of drinks to other people’s beer tabs = losing my phone, emptying my purse all over the car, and falling down drunk. Oh, and SUMMERTIME.

5. Can’t Deny, Orange Sky. - That’s all I’m going to say about THAT.

6. The night I have no recollection of falling down a bazillion times, being carried out of Town Ballroom, or having a screaming match with Jodie in front of the venue. What I do remember is sobbing uncontrollably and walking down the street barefoot. And then I attempted to go see Electric Six at The Tralf. Instead I fell at the door way and wasn’t allowed in. So Mauren and I walked to Allentown/Jodie’s and got offered drugs & twizzlers from some nignogs along the way.

7. WATF/New York Dolls Post-Show — EPIC.

8. 4th of July aka The Night I drank a bottle of Cherry Vodka.

9. EARTHQUAKE.

10. Halloween Open Bar

11. Cinco De Mardi Lush / CakeInTheFace II

12. Bam-BOOZ-le Hotel Hang

13. Cobra Starship @ Infinity - One step away from being kicked out for drinking a can of beer I didn’t purchase at the bar & Ring saved me. I think I spent the rest of the show in the bathroom/outside because I was too drunk/angry to remember how much fun I had dancing to Cobra.

14. JOCO @ Xtreme

15. Mr. & Mrs. Bachleor & Bachleorette Party

Honorable Mentions: Leah & I outside in Rockchester — we logically we got drunk by ourselves. Throwing up in Water Street’s parking lot…behind a dumpster. Any time I went to Palm Gardens. Any time there was a Friday Night Ritual. Any time I was in Buffalo. Any time I was at Town Ballroom or on Hertal Ave. Any time I was with Jodie Justice. Um….. yeah. I spent a lot of this year… drunk.

Favorite names people called me in 2008 - other than Jillie Lush:

Jillian, Smo, Smobama, Blazer Girl, Wednesday Adams

Things only May May & Smo Understood in 2008:

Authtin, Lifecoaches, Shaniqua, Aquafiniqua, Mishawka, Shipshewana, Big League Chew, Homies 1-5, GB Inc: Building Mysteries, Paddle Boating @ Chautaqua Lake, Merrriner, PGs, Summatime.

My Favorite Inside Jokes of 2008 (in no specific order):

Cinco De Mardi Gras
CakeInTheFace
EPIC
Rock Of Audio Love & Big Lush
BOOZE, depends, BOOZE, extra pants, BOOZE, handcuffs, BOOZE, roofies Shh, Just Go With It
Mustachio
Andre “Saxaphone” 3000
Color in a Crayon Box
DIWWAF
WHATSAGOINON?

(I’m forgetting so many things… I’ll probably add to this. Feel free to contribute!)

Best Infomercial 2008:

ShamWow

“You following me, camera guy?”
“It’s made in Germany. You know the Germans always make good stuff.”

Slap Chop

“You’re gonna love my nuts!”
“Fettucine, linguine, martini, bikini”
“This tuna is BORING. Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life.”
“You’re gonna be in a great mood all day because you’re gonna be slapping your troubles away!”
“”This is gonna make you cry, you’re making me cry. Life is hard enough as it is, you don’t want to cry anymore.”

Vince is the man! Much better than Billy Mays in my opinion. Thanks, Vince for telling me what I do and don’t need in my life. And remember he can’t do this all day. So call now! He’s got me sold. Where do I sign up? Also, I wonder what would happen if you Slap Chopped a ShamWow?! Also, do you think Vince is avaliable to be my new best friend? Or my lifecoach, maybe?

Funniest Videos on YouTube in 2008:

Mama Gorbel - Home Alone

Facebook Infomercial Parody

Super Mario Rescues The Princess

Our Reaction when David A. Lost - Reply

Me And My Gansta Self

Deaths that bummed me out:
1. tim russert
2. george carlin
3. heath ledger

News worthy events I was most interested in:
1. Barack Obama is elected the 44th President of the United States and Joe Biden is elected the 47th Vice President. Barack Obama becomes the first African-American President-elect.
2. Eliot Spitzer prostitution scandal
3. Investigation into the disappearance/apparent murder of Caylee Anthony
4. Mumbai Attacks
5. Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich Arrest for trying to sell Senate seat.

Most Unintentionally Funny Person Of 2008:

1. Sarah Palin

xo,

Jillie Lush